Your Truth Isn't The Only Truth

Recently a Facebook post was made (like the beginning of every bad story) where a comment was made insinuating someone close to me was a bad person. Someone uncaring and cold, selfish and unintelligent. It of course didn’t mention this person by name, but the insinuation of who it truly was pointed at was clear as could be if you knew the situation. And although I know this person would never see this post, never see the comments, I let it affect me (obviously- here I am writing about it).

And while I am still sad that someone I know to be hardworking, dedicated, loving, and generous was being painted in a negative light I also realized something.

My truth- the positives of this person- are not everyone’s truth.

I know to several people in life I’m probably not on their nice list. I’ve made mistakes and hurt people even when that wasn’t my intention, and so to some I’m cruel, judgmental, egocentric, conceited- the list goes on.

But I was also recently told a student thinks I’m “the nicest teacher” they have ever had. Those closest to me know I worry most about other people. I know the one I judge most is myself.

Just because we see someone in one light it doesn’t mean it’s the only version of them out there. 

Just because I feel a certain way about someone it doesn’t mean everyone does.

I know people I think are great that I can admit have probably hurt other people and are on their bad side. Just because I like someone it doesn’t mean everyone does. In the same light, someone or something I have distaste for may be someone’s favorite. 

My truth isn’t the truth. 

Another beginning to a bad story, I also recently saw a TikTok that has been on my mind. The basic idea was that everyone believes the world revolves around them and that’s why we are so messed up. We’ve lost the ability to see outside of ourselves and our experiences and consider other people, and that’s why we have so much anger, hatred, and division.

We see things as we want to see them, and we do that because our lives and experiences have conditioned us to believe certain things. That in itself is just human- actually, that’s not even human specific.

Two dogs born from the same litter can have completely different temperaments based on how and where they are raised.

The dog who was given a safe home and shown love will be kinder and less quick to react when facing strange people or situations. 

The dog raised on the street that had to fight for survival will continue to fight, be reactive in uncertainty and always be a little on guard.

So, if it’s true for animals, how can we be different?

When we accept we are all raised differently and have different experiences that have shaped us, maybe we can understand why others think differently.

Now I’m not saying everyone’s opinion is valid because some people who only wish harm on others don’t count. But for most normal everyday people, we should be able to step back when things are different and say “I don’t feel or believe what you do, I don’t agree, but I also get your opinion was shaped by whatever you have been through.”

I grew up in small town Wyoming. Population 210, graduation class of 4. I was raised in the country, had a teacher for a mom and a rancher for a dad. Volleyball, basketball, rodeo, track and FFA were my extracurriculars. I have one sister. I was 8 years old when I was diagnosed with diabetes.

While each of these things have shaped me, each one isn’t unique to me by itself. What makes me and my opinions one of a kind is that all these things/ and more/ have combined to make me who I am. To give me the insights and beliefs I have. To create the individual who holds certain truths.

But just as I teach my 4th graders, there is a difference in fact and opinion.

And it’s time we all realize our opinions won’t be the same, and my truth is not the only truth.

Neither is yours.